I received a phone call late yesterday evening. One of which left me hanging up the phone after the conversation and re-evaluating my entire involvement with this company and my responsibility.

The gentleman was calling to check on an order and new of my poor health and that weather for the past 12 days has been really crummy on the East coast and understood
Kindly that there was a delay in getting the orders out. He also mentioned that he had followed the thread on the Café.

While he agreed with my overall consensus of our Saddle, he agreed with me that I had crossed the line possibly but understood that sometimes things need to be done that all will not see the same way. What he said next sent my mind into a whirlwind.

This is his first purchase with RNT II. His chapter club has numerous members who
He says all use and bring in different RNT II props and even Sherwood cups, he said he always admired them and someday hoped to get a set of cups from us. He then proceeded to say, both RNT II and Sherwood Magic have achieved “Legacy Status” in the magic community, he proceeded to say that both companys are considered by both professionals in the club and amateurs to be the best out there.

What do you say to something like that?

Never in all my time from the start ever considered RNT II to be a legacy, at least not while I was still breathing. I felt like I had just been hit with a ton of guilt. Any spite or bitterness I had immediately left me. How petty have I been? How inconsiderate in an overall sense of professionalism? Just to prove a point that the public already probally knew but that wasn’t enough for me. One sincere phone call from a complete stranger
Has changed things so drastically that I indeed feel ashamed.

While I don’t feel comfortable mentioning his name without his permission, if he is still following this thread, all I can say is God Bless you and thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Over the years here, I have felt jaded, I guess because of the beating we took when company changed hands, but in the back of my mind, what hurt the most was the fact that the people who not only took shots at the company did so on a personal level of both myself and my family. I knew eventually the truth would eventually surface and I guess being naïve expected everyone that had publicly thrown rocks at us to publicly say “I’m sorry.” While one person out of everyone has called and did apologize for being party to the bashing, it was still never said publicly. I think I have carried all the hatred and spite that has built up over the years until last night.

The goal was to make RNT II a great company, I wasn’t figuring in financials just presence in the market place. Overall goals were to make the company self supporting and not run at a loss. Never once in all my years have I drawn a paycheck from the company, I had my other 2 business’ that made my living for me, much of which I funneled into RNT II to keep it alive. I had that much faith in both the consumer and the company. But then something happened beyond all the personal and company slandering, I suffered a major heart attack. This should have been an eye opener for me but rather I let it just add to the bitterness and spite that I was already carrying. Instead of nurturing the supporting consumers I was letting bitterness eat me away and be forefront.
All I can offer is my apology to everyone, especially Brett.

For years now people have inquired what SBL stands for. It’s a young lady’s initials who also changed my life forever and turned my reasons around for staying on with RNT II.

For those that are interested, this is the story.

Just months into taking over RNT II, the fallout was far worse than we had all anticipated. Debts surfacing that were not disclosed, having to deal with vendors where orders had been placed and were sitting stale. It seemed that RNT II was a dismal bottomless pit. Richard Mendez and I were supporting each others emotional distress the best we could trying to keep each other’s chins up. Richard had a serious fallout to deal with outside of RNT II and I found myself alone on the battlefield. Postings were coming in on a forum, saying the New RNT II doesn’t have anything original of their own, it’s all existing product. In between trying to clean up the mess from the past I was burning the candle at both ends trying to come up with ideas that would make us unique.

I was at the point of giving up, only 7 months into the company after transition and I was ready to quit it all. I had my sign business, I didn’t need this. Why am I even doing this?
That was the question that plagued me, why am I doing this? What do I have to prove? Nothing was the answer and I called everyone together at the time and said lets go out to dinner, we need to talk. It was most likely the single best call I made since being with RNT II.

To understand what happened you have to know that I had a lot of childhood trauma, a lot of which I blocked out most of childhood, both good and bad. Some of my closest friends in magic know what happened, some don’t and I won’t recap that here.

It was April and still very cold here in VA. Wind was blowing and we all met at a local restaurant, I ushered everyone in ahead of me and followed last. As I walked in behind everyone a young lady looked up at me and smiled and said “Hello” and smiled again.
It was at that time, that time itself seemed to stop I heard no talking in the dining area, no one seemed to move and a memory from my childhood came rushing back that changed the entire outcome of the reason for meeting. A simple sincere smile and hello from a complete stranger was about to change everything.

My childhood was rotten, I was cheated out of a father, life was chaotic, I was self destructive and had no reason to look at the world in a beautiful way. I was a 16 year old boy who was filled with more hate and bitterness than one could imagine. But I found an outlet, I took the hobby of magic back up. It took my mind off things. I didn’t’ care about making money, I just wanted to do magic. I was doing parties for pay and when I could I would always perform for the local nursing home and hospital in the children’s ward. The more I performed as a teenager in the hospital, the more I realized that though I lost my father, there were others that far worse off than myself.

One weekend as I finished a show the nurse asked if I could do a short bedside show for a young lady my age, 16. I was happy to. The nurse said, she doesn’t react much to anything and doesn’t talk. The young girl, Sara had been in an automobile accident, both her parents had been killed and she had no living relatives. It was very hard to even walk into the room seeing her in traction, badly scarred, but yet a very beautiful girl. She had a very sad and lonely look on her face, so much so it made me sad.

I stalled for a moment, I didn’t know what to do as she just lay there and starred. I produced a sponge ball from a purse frame. Her eyes opened and she smiled so big, and said with a giggle in her voice “ do it again”. The nurse watching just looked in amazement. I had never seen any one person so happy and smile so big and have so much meaning. I performed about 5 or 6 effects and then sat and talked with her awhile. She asked me to promise to come back. Which I did without hesitation. She was more magical to me than I was to her. The smile made my cold heart warm again.

Every day after school I went to visit her, she had no friends or family that did so I wanted to be her friend. I would sit and talk with her, she told me her plans for her life after she was all better, she didn’t have much use of her arms so I would sit and read to her. I found myself going to school less and less and spending time with her.

I still performed for the other children and the nursing home, and had taken up building props in the garage. One day I had finished a new prop and was heading to the hospital to see Sara, when I got there she was gone. She had been transferred to a youth shelter and the hospital could not tell me where. I was crushed. The single most important person next to my father had been taken away, again. I immediately went into self destruct mode again. One day during class in highschool I just stood up collected my books, went to the office and said I quit. I went home, told my mother goodbye and walked out the door. That day I put my entire childhood memory behind me and I was only 17 by this time. I ended up working the carnival circuit until I as 18 and then joined
The military, I figured this was the place for me to learn to control all the bitterness that I carried.

So to make a long story short Magic changed me, it drove me and it broke me all at the same time, until that night in April, where SBL smiled and said hello and brought me back to the one time in my life that I can truly say I was happy. SBL made me realize that night why I did magic and made it, I didn’t do it for the money, I did it to see the smile on peoples faces, the amazement.

So again, one person with a single word and smile hello, gave me all the energy to move on with RNT II. A single person whom I’ve never met, has made me realize instead of being bitter and spiteful, I should be thankful. Her smile was an inspiration.

The SBL line of magic was designed as a thank you for waking me up, for giving me back a memory I had forgotten and for helping me remember the magic of the smile was the greatest payment of all. There are numerous products in sketch and current prototyping, 67 to be exact that will make up the complete SBL line. When the SBL line is complete it will be turned over to her as her own company. Again, just a thank you for doing something that not many have been ever able to make me do, smile and change my views. She touched my memory, she touched my heart with just a smile, how can something so simple be so powerful? I want both Sara and SBL to be remembered in Magic History and for people to know that SBL played a large part in the success of this company.

This has probally been one of the longest letters or posts I have ever written in ages and I appreciate anyone who has read it, RNT II appreciates your support, we appreciate your friendship, we appreciate you period. And my sincerest apology for my bitter actions that had taken over my very being with this company.

One thing I have always told anyone involved with RNT II, if they become a liability the company had no problem eliminating them from the team. What I have come to realize, I have been not an Asset as much as a liability myself to the company. I need to deeply re-evaluate myself and see to what point I am still an asset if any after my action.

Again, my thanks for taking the time to read this and my deepest apology for scournful attitudes in my postings.

Sincerely and Magic,
Jake